Friday, February 28, 2014

Shit + Time → Monsters

On the Spontaneous Generation of Monsters

Night soil, excrement, sewage: thinking beings have a powerful aversion to their own waste. It breeds not only foul miasmas and disease but stranger mischief. There is strong reason shite is kept closeted, closed, and buried out in the country. (Unlike those foul cities further inward, where it flows open through the streets if rumour can be believed.) The further one gets from the King at Ashnest, the wilder and less certain the world becomes.

Left unchecked and exposed to night-air, shite will generate foul and monstrous things. [Sewage left under starlight has a  25% chance per hour of generating one monster per gallon. Landslides, floods, and earthquakes can open up municipal and rural latrines making bad situations terrible.] Called by some accounts goblins or kobolds or cess-trolls [a more general term], these small noisome creatures usually have little more than animal intelligence. Frighteningly enough, these abominations can breed themselves from their own droppings. [Only 1 out of 10 of these kobolds, gremlins, or whatever-monsters are capable of sexual reproduction. These elite breeders have intellects running the gamut of human potential and typically branch off to form their own tribes.] Often violent in the defense of their territory, cess-trolls can quickly overrun an area. If left unchecked they can deplete the countryside of resources in short order.


Some few of these strange beasts can rise above their station and are capable of rational thought. This trait unfortunately begins to breed true in successive generations. As time passes, the likelihood of more powerful and cunning monsters increases. [1 out of 100 2nd+ generation cess-trolls will give birth to male/female twins of a different, stronger variety of monster such as pig-faced orcs, foul ogres,  or beast men. These new monsters grow rapidly and always leave to form their own clans. Luckily these new forms are incapable of asexual reproduction.]

Know too, snake eggs grow like a fungus upon the graves of liars. Should a bird make nest above such graves, there is a small chance that each egg lain will grow to an enormous size and produce a fearsome wyvern. [1 in 1,000 chance of 1 wyvern egg per nest.]

Furthermore, bats are born from the screams of lost children rebounding off stones in the wilderness. [Any scream of a sentient being in the night has the possibility of producing a bat. Each successive echo of that scream breeds another bat.] However, should the screams cross a unconsecrated grave thrice, a terrible, bloodthirsty Night Stalker shall be formed from the bones. [AKA a Vampire. The grave doesn't have to be unconsecrated, any unmarked grave will do. The first victim is usually the screamer. Sometimes it's the one causing the screaming, but the world is rarely that just by nature.]

The Dragon is, of course, born of the ashes of the Kingdom falling...

...None know why the many gods have wrought the world this way, but they have. For good or ill, it is our lot to live in it.